Pointless torrents

Pointless torrents

Tides rush down my face and through my soul;

some of anger, some of anguish, some of no description at all.

These emotions are all-consuming;

but times, like tides, are progressing to a notable point.
The moment lets me freeze inside an infinite thought;

an idea, a theory, an unwritable hypothesis,

concluding in the casting out of one by another;

excluding nothing but the understanding of one by another.

That’s almost the only definite point at this stage:

I may not, can not, will not, shall not, dare not, understand.

Forgiveness and love are clouded by blistering torrents of rage,

pointless though they are, since the contributing events were not done by my hand.
I am enveloped by the pointless torrents;

the pointlessness is of no concern to me –

it is beyond my frame of reason –

I may still use the fact to effect my positive healing in the future.
pointless torrents

Animosity, grief and indescribable waves of destruction take hold of me.

Keeping my head above the water is a task simply impossible in these furious currents,

although I’m not sure whether I’ve quite attempted the task yet.

The task is a testing deed that I may not, cannot, will not, shall not, dare not, complete.
That’s almost the only definite point at this stage:

I may not, can not, will not, shall not, dare not, care.

Wasting my precious time and talents on this scenario is bound to land me in a gilded cage.

That is acceptable – but only if someone would consider to share.
Gilded cages are for confused fledgelings and ego-maniacal outlaws

and these two types, I dare say, will not co-habitate well at all.

© Annalinde Louw 2005

This piece was written on 5 November 2005